What Types of Support Do Doulas Provide?
Doula support falls under one of three categories: planning, preparing, and processing.
Planning
Planning support can include advance care forms, such as directives and supplemental questionnaires. A doula will not make any medical or legal recommendations regarding specific decisions, though. Instead, we encourage clients to have conversations with their doctor or lawyer, and we offer to brainstorm questions together before those appointments.
Doulas promote informed consent. We want to ensure clients have all the information they need concerning pre/post-death care, and to make their best choices in regard to living well during the time they have left.
Additionally, details like scheduling appointments and visits as well as organizing meal deliveries and pet walking can be arduous alongside the emotional, exhausting journey at life’s end. Doulas can manage some of the minutiae so loved ones can be more present at the bedside. To aid in the process of releasing one’s earthly grasp, a doula might assist with “death cleaning” and/or bequeathing treasured items.
Preparing
Preparing includes setting up each client’s space and natural network of friends and family members for optimal living and dying (vigil) experiences — with contingency plans, of course. Doulas connect clients to beneficial resources when services fall outside of our role and scope. We research what is available in our local community and have a trusty directory list at the ready.
We gently remind clients: It often feels “too early” until it’s too late, in terms of accepting hospice care, checking off bucket list items, or expressing what they hold deeply.
Processing
Doulas are story-catchers. We listen with sincerity and kindness. Many clients spend time reminiscing as time grows short. They appreciate invitations to vent and lament to someone who will not attempt to cheer them up or minimize their concerns. They want to reflect on memories, hardships, joys, and patterns of behavior.
Some clients might want to capture some of their stories in a more lasting form — legacy projects. Doulas help design customized options that can include audio or video recordings, a scrapbook with photos, a t-shirt quilt, artwork, or another type of gift that reflects the uniqueness of each particular person.
Originally published by course developer Francesca Arnoldy on MedPage Today as "Shape-Shifting as an End-of-Life Doula During COVID."
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